The Truth About Over-Thinkers
Where is the line between thinking (someone wanting to be prepared, plan ahead, and anticipate with a positive purpose), and someone who overthinks?
To an extent, problem-assessing and problem-solving is a process that is natural and helpful in adapting to the demands of life. Beyond that, into overthinking, is detrimental to a person’s sense of self, emotional well being, and felt connection in relationships.
Problem-solving is meant to develop a solution, while overthinking requires a hyper-fixation on the problem itself. The line between thinking and overthinking is linked to fear and shame.
Over-thinkers have sensitive hearts.
They learn to use their brain as both a shield and a weapon to ward off potential failure, rejection, judgement or abuse. They believe they can think their way around avoiding all pain; often by emphasizing past pain as a constant reminder to never let it happen again.
The logic is: “If I scare myself now, I can achieve relief later”. The majority of their energy and focus is directed at something they don’t want to happen, rather than aiming their energy and focus at what they do want.
At some point in their life, often beginning in childhood, over-thinkers learned —
Protecting their heart is more important than being in touch with it.
Clearly there were times in the over-thinker’s life that required this emphasis on protection. However, sometimes they get stuck in survival mode, and don’t realize their life doesn’t require that anymore. Instead of their mind being a tool to protect themself, it becomes their prison.
Overthinking only gives us two options: to ruminate about the past or worry about the future. It is no wonder why over-thinkers aren’t able to be present and enjoy their life.
If we aren’t in touch with our hearts, we can’t be led by them.
If we aren’t led by them, we won’t end up where we want to be.
Our head will always lead us to a safe place.
But our heart will lead us to where we belong.
Where Can I Find More Help?
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